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A question to the former Mrs Rushdie – Why do you think he married you? Love?

One story I liked this week was that Padma Lakshmi the former American/Indian model and former fourth wife of the famous Indian/British writer Sir Salman Rushdie has herself now written a book about their brief three-year marriage accusing him of being “jealous, needy and sexually insatiable“.

Here’s a photo of the couple in happier times:

WEST HOLLYWOOD, CA - MARCH 05: Padma Lakshmi and writer Salman Rushdie arrive at the Vanity Fair Oscar Party at Mortons on March 5, 2006 in West Hollywood, California. (Photo by Evan Agostini/Getty Images)

I have a question for ex-Mrs Rushdie – look at the picture, darling, and ask yourself why do you think the dirty old dog married you when he was 56 and you were only 33 .

I will make this simple, love, by only giving two multiple choices. Did he marry you because of:

A) Your towering intellect and scintillating conversation?

or

B) Unlimited opportunities to play with your tits and shove his (viagra-assisted?) helmeted warrior of love into your mouth, pussy and a certain other orifice we don’t mention in polite company?

No need to think about it too long, poppet. It’s not a trick question.

(I suspect that for filthy old lecher Sir Salman the answer was always clearly ‘B’. But perhaps in order to bed his lovely fourth ex-wife, he managed to convince her the answer was ‘A’. And such a difference of views about the purpose of the marriage was never going to lead to a successful, long-term relationship)

Here’s a thought for you, former fourth Mrs Rushdie. Judging from what I’ve seen from the behaviour of Indian men in the Land of Smells – where you always have four, five or six men taking just one girl for boom boom – you’re lucky the famous scribbler Sir Salman didn’t invite round all his Indian friends for a bit of fun with you and your various orifices. Ooops! Maybe he did and that’s why your marriage hit the rocks?

Funny old world, isn’t it, former Mrs Rushdie?

Still, no doubt you walked away with plenty of money from Sir Salman for each time the great writer plunged his mighty (viagra-enhanced?) pork sword into your body during your courtship and then three-year marriage.

But what does that make you, former model and former Mrs Rushdie?

Here’s a hint, honey – it rhymes with substitute. Alternatively it rhymes with score or bore or even more.

10 comments to A question to the former Mrs Rushdie – Why do you think he married you? Love?

  • joseph yates

    Italy Openly Fighting With EU and Germany; Country on Brink of Questioning Euro.

    Athens and Rome Expose Europe’s Greatest Faultlines

    Italy has €200 billion in non-performing loans, plus another €150bn of troubled debt. It has no productivity growth for 15 years, through its own fault.

    As one might expect under such conditions, prime minister Matteo Renzi has openly attacked the policies of the EU on numerous fronts including energy, Russia, fiscal deficits, and German dominance of the entire apparatus.

    How much longer can this go on before a Eurosceptic opposition party gains control?

    “Italy’s long-term sustainability in the eurozone is just as uncertain as that of Greece,” says Financial Times writer Wolfgang Münchau in his article Athens and Rome Expose Europe’s Greatest Faultlines.

    Europe’s policy of muddling through, of doing the minimum required, and hoping to mop up the rubble later, might even have worked if the refugees had stayed at home. The EU’s mistake was not to have chosen a path that would lead to invariable ruin, but to render itself defenseless against the next unforeseen shock. ”
    Italian and German Taxpayers Will Foot the Cleanup Bill

    One way or another, taxpayers will pay. When Italy has finally had enough with the Eurozone and returns to the Lira, Italian taxpayers will pay via inflation.

    It won’t just be Italian taxpayers on the hook. German taxpayers (remaining Eurozone taxpayers in general), will get repaid in Lira for debts owed in Euros. Target2 imbalances ensure that result.

    The final result will be a very destructive breakup of the eurozone. The only possible way to avoid that dire result would be for Germany to leave the Eurozone first.

    http://mishtalk.com/2016/03/07/italy-openly-fighting-with-eu-and-germany-on-brink-of-questioning-euro/

  • joseph yates

    Devil Demands and Receives More Concessions from Merkel: In Bed with a Dictator.

    When you make a bargain with the devil or a dictator, and they did not get everything they wanted in round one of bargaining, it’s a certainty round two is coming up.

    So here we are, with German chancellor Angela Merkel ready and willing to offer more concessions to Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan in order to slow the refugee migration into the Eurozone.

    Merkel’s latest concessions come despite the fact that Erdogan is now the de-facto dictator of Turkey, having just taken over Turkey’s largest newspaper with a violent teargas raid by riot police.

    Subscriptions immediately collapsed.

    http://mishtalk.com/2016/03/07/merkel-in-bed-with-dictator/

  • tony G

    http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2016-03-07/sexual-assaults-soar-swedish-swimming-pools

    by Ingrid Carlqvist via The Gatestone Institute,

    Young male asylum seekers have turned Sweden’s public swimming pools into ordeals of rape and sexual assault.

    Swedish politicians seem convinced that some education on “equality” will change the ways of men, who, since childhood, have been taught that it is the responsibility of women not to arouse them — and therefore the woman’s fault if the man feels like raping her.

    More and more Swedes are now avoiding public pools altogether.

    Staff at Malmö’s Hylliebadet family adventure pool were given strict instructions not to report certain things, and above all, never to mention the ethnicity or religion of those who cause problems at the pool.

    “What the Afghans are doing is not wrong in Afghanistan, so your rules are completely alien to them. … If you want to stop Afghans from molesting Swedish girls, you need to be tough on them. Making them take classes on equality and how to treat women is pointless. The first time they behave badly, they should be given a warning, and the second time you should deport them from Sweden.” — Mr. Azizi, manager of a hotel in Kabul, Afghanistan

    http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2016-03-07/sexual-assaults-soar-swedish-swimming-pools

  • tony G

    Kick Turkey Out of NATO.

    There’s a Petition at Change.org to suspend Turkey’s membership in NATO.

    Why kick Turkey out of NATO?

    Because:

    Turkey just shut down the largest Turkish newspaper using tear gas, water canons and brutality:

    Turkey has destroyed free speech and freedom of the press. And see this

    Turkey imprisons more journalists than any other country in the world

    Journalists – such as Dutch reporter Frederike Geerdink or Vice News’ Mohammed Rasool – are regularly detained on spurious charges

    Anyone who criticizes Turkey’s president is arrested

    Twitter reports that the Turkish government made more content removal requests than any other in the world … before completely blocking Twitter and Youtube

    After reporters, local police and Turkish generals caught a weapons shipment from Turkey into Syria, they were all arrested on “treason” charges for exposing the shipment

    Turkey’s president says he doesn’t have to follow the rulings of Turkey’s top court

    Turkey is one of the main supporters of ISIS and Al Nusra

    Turkey provided the chemical weapons used in the famous attacks which killed hundreds in Syria. Pulitzer-prize winning investigative reporter Seymour Hersh – who uncovered the Iraq prison torture scandal and the Mai Lai massacre in Vietnam – previously reported that high-level American sources tell him that the Turkish government carried out the chemical weapons attacks blamed on the Syrian government

    Unless reined in, Turkey may well get us into WW3 with Russia.

    http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2016-03-07/kick-turkey-out-nato

  • Petrified Pete

    David Cameron’s “Project Fear” plan to scare the British people into accepting European rule (and denying Brexit) is being exposed by more than just the usual realists (e.g. Nigel Farage). Despite dozens of self-serving military and business leaders siding with Cameron, The Telegraph reports, the head of one of the UK’s leading business groups dramatically resigned last night, accusing David Cameron of peddling “highly irresponsible” scare stories to keep Britain in the European Union.

    John Longworth quit as director general of the British Chambers of Commerce after he was suspended by the board on Friday after he breached the BCC’s policy of neutrality on the June 23 referendum.

    Setting out his personal view, he told members in his speech that “the very best place for the UK to be is in a reformed EU” but “I have come to the conclusion that the EU is incapable of meaningful reform, at least in the foreseeable future”.

    His supporters have claimed that Downing Street “bullied” the BCC to discipline him last week over his Eurosceptic stance – an allegation that Number 10 has denied.

    Speaking exclusively to The Telegraph, he launched a scathing attack on the Prime Minister’s campaign to keep Britain in the EU.

    http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2016-03-07/peddling-hyperbole-british-business-boss-bashes-camerons-brexit-scaremongering

  • Petrified Pete

    Will Italian Banks Spark Another Financial Crisis?

    Shares of Italy’s largest financial institutions have plummeted in the opening months of 2016 as piles of bad debt on their balance sheets become too high to ignore. Amid all of the risks facing EU members in 2016, the risk of contagion from Italy’s troubled banks poses the greatest threat to the world’s already burdened financial system.

    So what makes Italy so much worse? While Greece has more than once brought the global financial markets to the brink, it is only the 44th largest economy in the world. Italy represents the 8th largest economy in the world.

    A deteriorating financial crisis in Italy could risk repercussions across the EU exponentially greater than those spurred by Greece. The ripple effects of market turmoil and the potential for dangerous precedents being set by EU authorities in panicked response to that turmoil, could ignite yet more latent financial vulnerabilities in fragile EU members such as Spain and Portugal.

    If recent history is any indication, observers and investors should greet such statements by politicians with considerable caution. In remarks during heightened concern over the Greek crisis in 2011, current European Commission President and then Prime Minister of Luxembourg, Jean-Claude Junker, stated “When it becomes serious, you have to lie.”

    http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2016-03-07/will-italian-banks-spark-another-financial-crisis

  • S sutton

    Brexit and a Hanseatic League .

    There is an elephant in the room that might also trip up the planned outcome, and that is a material and growing risk of financial instability in the Eurozone. While it is probable that no major problems will surface before June, there is a significant possibility they will. The Eurozone’s banking system is somewhere between insolvency and bankruptcy with the Italian, Greek and Portuguese banks in intensive care. Eurozone government bond prices, many so over-priced they have negative yields, are certain to fall significantly at some stage, leading to an inevitable Eurozone debt crisis.

    Add to this the refugee problem, and we have the makings of an all too obvious Eurozone bust-up. Furthermore, it is reported that the Czech Republic’s prime minister, Bohuslav Sobotka, has warned that if Britain decides to leave the EU, the Czech Republic may follow. Furthermore, there is pressure for a similar referendum in the Netherlands. Disaffection with Brussels is widespread, and it will not be just a British rat abandoning the sinking EU ship.

    https://www.goldmoney.com/brexit-and-a-hanseatic-league

  • David Brown

    S Sutton the other Elephant or more acuratly Giant surapod in the room is the financial liabilities of Deutsche Bank.
    The reason Cameron rushed the EU vote is that in October Turkish citizens will no longer be required to have a visa to enter the EU.Turkey is a main conduit for Muslim migrants entering the EU via Greek Islands. If they can acquire Turkish documentation we will not see media images of marchers as they will arrive by conventional means.
    Is the EU going to collapse? Unfortunately no its going to morph into what the project was about the geographic re-construction of the Roman Empire. The current Muslim immigration into the EU and the economic crisis are part of a plan for evil. Check out on YOUTUBE the 1976 movie
    The Omen 65 minutes into the film.

  • Nick

    Err….. did no one read the article? It’s about Salman Rushdie.

  • Thanks for pointing out that the blog today was indeed about the fourth Mrs Rushdie and not the (hopefully imminent) collapse of the EU

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