The Labour and Tory governments’ favourite management consultancy, McKinsey, is pocketing millions or even tens of millions of pounds of our money imposing a top-down reorganisation of the NHS that will increase bureaucracy and waste. This is after the Tories promised us there would be no more top-down reorganisations of the NHS and that they would reduce NHS bureaucracy and waste. But judging from a song reportedly sung at a McKinsey consultants’ Christmas party, McKinsey’s millionaire consultants don’t think much of their clients – us and our government. (I believe this should be sung to the tune of Hark the herald angels sing, repeating the last two lines of each verse as a chorus)
If you aim to get the best result And maximum performance you want to see Then you really should consult A Management Consultancy McKinsey management consultants are we We take all our clients’ money We can earn many a million Because our clients have no vision. If Process Redesign is what you will And you think it’ll make a success of all you do Then rely on us to send you a bill While we redesign your processes for you. We are from McKinsey – young, bright and flash We take mountains of our clients’ cash We win lots of new clients rich and fine When we go round flogging Process Redesign We’ve got handouts and we’ve got flip charts And dazzling PowerPoint presentations And we blow clients away With our brilliant explanations. We are McKinsey’s little lackeys Telling clients they’re in trouble is just one of our strategies Our language is smart and makes our clients ill-at-ease – It’s what we call ’Consultantese’. The culture at ……. is a real dead weight But we crush resistance before it grows We’re used to organisations in a dreadful state Because, of course, we are Pros! We are McKinsey’s real hard core We are the ones who’ll win the war Now we’re going to party and have fun because Cheers! We’ve just got our bonuses from Santa Claus.