Is Bournemouth the most corrupt town in Britain?

Down here in Bournemouth the stench of corruption is overwhelming. We have big scale corruption. The council paid over £3m for an artificial surf reef. It doesn’t work, but our £3m has gone. There may have been a few palms greased to get that done. Then our hospital paid £5.4m to Kier Construction, arguably Britain’s most corrupt construction company, for a hospital car park that should only have cost £3.5m. More brown envelopes being passed around? I had to resign as elected hospital governor in protest when the chief executive refused to take action.

Then we have small scale corruption. When I bought my flat, I thought my lawyer and surveyor were working for me. Far from it, they lied to me to get the sale through. When I pointed out that they had cheated me, the lawyer gave me £4,000 and the surveyor £2,500 just to stop me revealing their corrupt practices. And now I’ve been threatened with extreme violence by the board who run the block of flats where I live because I’ve been asking questions about £250,000 of residents’ money that seems to have ‘disappeared’. Curiously, one of the board members is a Mr. Steve Cable who happens to work for Kier Construction, arguably Britain’s most corrupt construction company.

Is Bournemouth the most corrupt town in Britain? Or is it just typical of the widespread corruption that has permeated all aspects of our life under Liar Blair and Liar Brown and which has continued under Liar Cameron?