Can Simon save the Singing Scarecrow?

Over 16 million people will be glued to the fiX-Factor this Saturday to see what tricks Simon Cowell comes up with to keep the singing scarecrow, Katie Waissel, in his supposed ‘competition’. Will he manipulate the voting results? Will he just tell the other well-paid and seemingly ever-obedient ‘judges’ how to vote? Or has he some other subtle trick up his expensively-tailored sleeve?

With its many unexpected twists, its incontinent�blubbing, its constant screaming and the raw talent of none of its contestants – the fiX-Factor has got everything that makes great TV. I’ll be watching too. So probably will you.