May 2024

Why not make our greedy, overpaid, thuggish footballers pay for their penalties? Because the FA are useless?

I watched some dreadful football over the last few weekends. Team after team faffed around for 90 minutes apparently without a clue as to how to score a goal. (By the way, passing the ball backwards is not the best way to score). But the one thing our overpaid, thuggish footballers were good at was constantly fouling each other. One of the best scenes was Liverpool goalkeeper headbutting a player from some other team as Liverpool floundered to defeat.

One way of controlling this thuggish behaviour might be to fine footballers for each foul and give the money raised to charities dedicated to training young unemployed people. For example, for every yellow card, a footballer should have to hand over one month’s wages to the charity. For every red card, it could be three months’ wages. This would raise a huge amount of money for charity and it might help our arrogant footballers concentrate on playing the game they are paid so much to play rather than kicking, tripping, punching and headbutting their opponents or diving spectacularly and dramatically just in front of their opponents’ goalmouth.

So come on, useless FA. Take some action. Oh sorry, I remember now why the FA won’t do anything. Aren’t the FA a bunch of arrogant, money-grabbing, incompetent fools? Didn’t they manage to squander over £30 million hiring and then paying off some of the worst team managers in the world to look after the hopeless, selfish, spoilt flops who play for England? So much for that idea.

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