February 2024
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“We are doing everything possible to protect Britain from Ebola”

As Ebola reaches first the US and now Spain, our useless government claims it is “doing everything possible to protect Britain from Ebola”.

Here is the Government’s full 10-point Ebola plan:

1. Continue to allow direct flights from the infected countries – stopping them would be “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”

2. Continue to allow people to travel to the UK from infected countries – stopping them would be “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”

3. Don’t carry out any health checks on people travelling from infected countries – doing such checks would be discriminatory, a breach of their Yuman Rights and be “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”

4. Keep lecturing us about the need to give millions of pounds in aid to the infected countries. But never mention that most of this aid will be stolen by corrupt African politicians and bureaucrats – mentioning this would be “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”

5. Don’t let the British people know that only $3m of $60m recently donated to Liberia by the EU to build clinics actually reached the Liberian Ministry of Health. The other $57m has gone ‘missing’ – mentioning this would be  “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”

6. Don’t let the British people know that the population of the infected countries is exploding – doubling every 25 years – so it’s not surprising these countries can’t afford decent healthcare –  mentioning this would be “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”

7. Continue to have some of the most lax, incompetent border controls in the world – having proper border controls would be discriminatory, a breach of people’s Yuman Rights and be “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”

8. Continue to encourage uncontrolled immigration from the infected countries – stopping it  would be discriminatory, a breach of people’s Yuman Rights and be “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”

9. Continue to allow people from the infected countries with family in Britain to move to the UK to live off probably the most generous benefits system in the world – stopping family members coming here  would be discriminatory, a breach of people’s Yuman Rights and be “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”

10. Bring any infected ‘British’ citizens back to the UK for treatment (instead of treating them in situ)


So, what could possibly go wrong?

4 comments to “We are doing everything possible to protect Britain from Ebola”

  • MGJ

    Yes, political correctness, socialist claptrap – call it what you will – is extraordinarly powerful in the UK. Acting as both the world’s most effective ever system of (self-)censorship and as a surrogate Constitution by limiting what government can do. Which in this case is, as you point out, absolutely nothing lest they be “waaacccciiiiissssttt!”.

  • BaronessBonkers

    Well bloody said. I think Simple Simon Cameron does wars and big boys stuff on a Saturday and Sunday economy on a Monday, Ebola and any other scare from which he and his fellow tossers are “protecting us (not, on a Wednesday leaving Thursday for a bit of European stuff and then Friday for doing sod all.
    They want everything to be “transparent” and it is. You can see through him like a clean window.
    What a bloody shambles. I heard the voices of Churchill and Enoch Powell on the radio yesterday. What men of vision! I guess the proletariat then actually believed the politicians, and with just cause.
    Then of course you have silly billy Clegg. What a **nt. He even makes Cameron look good.

  • My wife who is a nurse came home this evening to tell me that she had been called in to see a patient from Uganda.

    She was instructed to wear a mask because they have not ascertained as yet what exactly he has but he has “a bad cough”.

    It’s more than likely TB, not Ebola but even so…

    I asked why he was here in Manchester.

    Asylum seeker apparently who also has diabetes (hence my wife’s involvement – she’s a Diabetic Specialist Nurse).

    You can imagine my joy at all this.

    The missus treats someone who shouldn’t even be here and then comes home with some possibly lethal virus.

    Yeah, you could have told me this before I gave you that kiss as you arrived home…

    The gentleman’s English was impeccable, though, apparently.

  • NoMore

    Farage is today being lambasted by the Grauniad et al for suggesting we only allow skilled, healthy immigrants into the country instead of HIV-ridden benefits fodder. The NHS is for the whole world after all seemingly. They haven’t said whether they think we should be allowing Ebola-ridden immigrants in too.

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