August 2017
M T W T F S S
« Jul    
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28293031  

What will you be buying PM David Cameron for Christmas?

I know you’ve all been lying awake at night fretting over what you should buy PM David Cameron for Christmas to thank him for being such a great leader for the last wasted three and a half years. Well, here are a couple of suggestions:

After the catastrophe of New Labour – 13 years spent wrecking the country – ruining our education system, bankrupting the economy, allowing in over 7 million (mostly benefits-scrounging, Britain-hating) immigrants, destroying our armed forces, creating an obese public sector of overpaid, over-pensioned self-serving fools – we needed vision and leadership to sort out the mess. But sadly, that’s not what we got. We got the cowardly, u-turning, liar Cameron.

The man didn’t even have the backbone to stand up to that schoolboy in long trousers Nick “Barroso’s Bitch” Clegg over electoral boundary reform.

And as the year comes to a close, the prospect of a McCluskey/Serwotka (sorry, I meant Miliband/Balls) government is less than 18 months away. Lord help us!

So how can we escape this impending disaster? By following these six simple steps:

Step 1 – UKIP comes first in the 2014 EU elections. Labour second and the Tories a miserable third

Step 2 – The Tories dump Gay Dave and choose a real leader

Step 3 – The Tories and UKIP do an electoral deal whereby the Tories agree not field candidates in 50 “safe” seats and in another 50 seats that Labour should win. UKIP in return agree not to field candidates in the other 550 seats and to get their supporters to vote Tory

Step 4 – A Tory/UKIP coalition wins the May 2015 General Election

Step 5 – The Tory/UKIP coalition presents the EU with a non-negotiable list of Britain’s demands for staying in the EU. No grovelling to corrupt, greedy. unelected bureaucrats from countries that are economically and morally bankrupt – just an ultimatum.

Step 6 – Either the EU agrees to the Tory/UKIP list of demands in full or else Britain holds an immediate referendum on continued membership.

Now, that would give us a great Christmas and wonderful New Year.

7 comments to What will you be buying PM David Cameron for Christmas?

  • right_writes

    I reckon that step 6 needs tightening up…

    “Either the EU agrees to the Tory/UKIP list of demands in full or else Britain holds an immediate referendum on continued membership.”

    This would be my take…

    Either the EU agrees to the Tory/UKIP list of demands in full or else Britain holds an immediate referendum on continued membership invokes Article 50 of the Lisbon Treaty… Namely two years notice to quit.

  • right_writes

    oops… forgot to close off the “strike” after the word referendum.

  • Paris Claims

    The conservatives could dump Cameron tomorrow and replace him with a real conservative and I (and hopefully millions of others) would still vote UKIP. Three and a half years of leftie Dave and hardly a whimper of protest from the rest of the party has changed me, a life long conservative voter, into someone who despises them. They really are the Labour B Team.

  • shortchanged

    Oh!! if only it could be so, do we really have to wait so long to get rid of these no hopers, help us Nigel Farage, you are our only hope. With apologies to Star Wars.

  • shortchanged

    The problem is Paris, they are all tarred with the same brush, so we need to send a message, loud and clear, WE are the politicians bosses, something they seem to not only forget, but to ignore. Like the BBC, they spend and abuse their power to feather their own nests. A pox on all their houses I say, bring back the lash, that will sort the men from the ‘boys’.

  • Roger

    The only thing i can think of giving this ani externus sphincter muscle of a man is Piles

  • Shortchanged

    Well said Roger, a double dose seems about right.

Leave a Reply

You can use these HTML tags

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>